Three weeks, nothing to do

Well here I go, I have three weeks with nothing on the cards but a bunch of sposed ta's and could-go-to's. My nuclear will be gone for the coming couple, which leaves me alone in the big house in Plymouth. I wish I had a bit of mischief left in me, but it looks like I got to go find it, shouldn't be too hard.

Mono-meanin-of-life

I have it! I mean, I had it- in my hands, in a manner of speaking, like in a box or something, y'know confined, like I knew where to find it and it now it's gone. I wish I could start to explain it, but I really wouldn't do it justice, there are no words to or not enough words. I'm telling you because I have to tell someone, even if there is not very much to tell. I want you to be happy for me, that I had it, because now it is with me, everywhere I go. You know, that's what's strange, I don't feel a difference. Like maybe I'm more confident because I know what it is, and I know it can be had, that I'm good enough to have it, but really I'm the same as before to anyone who sees me. I like to think that it is apparent, but just look at the way you reacted or, I mean, the lack there of. There is no difference, and nothing can hold a candle to it, true love, fame, wealth, whatever, so I am satisfied to know that it exists and that I will never be without that knowledge.

Politics

Politics is not just for those who are politicians. We live lives inside of politics everyday, it is the rhetoric of emotions and the jargon of convention. I am appaulled that innocent people are being taken advantage of and I do not know how other people can be okay with it. The equifiers of "I've got to feed my family," or "If I didn't, someone else would," are two of the most disgusting phrases in the English language. And yet, I too live inside of these walls, walls that someone else created. Why? Because I am not tall enough to see above them. But I will give someone else a boost, I will stand on the shoulder that is offered. I hope.

Manolag- "Need a Job?"
Interior of a diner in the midwest.
Hi there, how are you? Yeah, me too brother, me too. What's that you're eatin? Pot pie? S'cuse me miss, can I get one of those pot pies? Thank you. Hey brother, I'm not bugging you, am I? I'm no weirdo, I'm just passin through your town, and I like to see what the locals eat and treat myself to a little hospitality. You see, I'm on the road too much, been on the road near all my life. It's my job, ya see, keeps me moving, always have to meet new people, meanin I always got to be in new places. You travel much? No? Well, it's not all it seems like. I mean, it feels like your doing something, like me always recruitin new people for our mission, keepin the company growin, and that makes you feel important. But in reality, it's the same job as any other. What'd you do? Laid off from the salt mine? Yeah, I hear you. I actually used to work for company a mining company too, til they laid eveybody off. Ain't that a strange feelin to know that you can give your best years to somewhere and they can just pack up and leave ya, like you was a part or something? Now, I'm travelling for a different company, contractor and I'm glad I found em. What'd you do? You drive trucks? Well, this company, were always looking for drivers, why don't I give you my card. We could have you makin double what you made in the mines in no time, and you'd be haulin again too, just overseas is all.

Up the Stakes!

Monooooo-

Put it in the fuckin bag! Don't look at me like that, like you think I'm going to kill you, because if you're good I won't kill you. You screwed me over and you knew you were doing it the whole time, so no, I do not trust you anymore. I was an idiot to trust you in the first place. Even when others said you were stealing from me and cheating me, I didn't believe them. I can't fucking believe it! You? How the fuck did you think it up? That's what I don't understand? I gave you everything, taught you everything and you turned around and try to rob me? You think I wouldn't find out? You think I tell you everything? Of course not, you dumb bitch. So now what do we do? Shut up! That was a retorical question, you're not going to do anything. I'm gonna walk out of here in a minute and you're gonna forget you ever knew my name. If I ever, ever see your ugly mug again you won't survive it. That means you're gonna move town. Take your family with you if you have to, tell them someone wants you dead. I ever even of hear you doing business , I'm gonna come for you and I'm gonna leave your body for your daughter to find. You've got the weekend.

Good Drugs for Bad People

Monosaurus-

Yeah, I know what you mean. I've thought about that before, but now, the way you put it, it kind of makes more sense. You've always had the best perspective on things. Seriously, you do! I mean now, think about it, we've always been complaining about him. We go on and on about what he's got, what he's doing, all the bullshit that he gets away with, even profits from, and that when it's us we always get busted. Well, listen to what you just said, "He never does the right thing, and he always get what he wants." That's it right there! He lies, he cheats, and what does he care? He knows that in the end nothing can touch him. But now we've figured him out. Next time he does something stupid don't go help him, promise me you won't. He needs to learn that by hurting other people, you can hurt yourself as well. Life is short, but it is just long enough for things to catch up with you. The old man's going to hell, but I want him to know he's going before he's there.

New Look

Hey Ya'll No Readers!

I redid the blog here and made a header for it that looks pretty sweet I do say. It is now after Thanksgiving and I am ever the more confused by life. There are many great roads to take, if only I had more cars...

Monica-o-logue

Monica: So, instead, you just didn't say anything? Waiting for someone to change is not a good reason to stick around! Ug, and to think that I was feeling that we were becoming more connected the whole time. It just goes to show how self serving we all are, that the two of us can be lying side-by-side in bed every night and be feeling two completely different things. You know I started doing things like trying to memorize your parents birthdays and thinking of children's names to match your last name, but all that bullshit means nothing now! You are such an asshole! No, no, I shouldn't say that. I'm the asshole. I remained faithful this whole time. I thwarted off your best friends advances, when I should have just been fucking him on the side. I started saving money for a house and a wedding, so I haven't had a vacation in a year and a half! But now, ha, now I get to pawn this stupid necklace and buy the plane ticket that I deserve. So, thank you for that, asshole. And don't forget to call your Mom and wish her a happy birthday for me, tell her about us tomorrow though, it'd break her heart.

Why you think you don't belong

The world has changed so much in the past hundred years, that we have no time to judge what the effect of progress really has done to us, to the individual. Even the psychological, analytical methods used to determine our state of being (emotion) has had no true competitor. We may be working on the wrong model of human existence.

Greed has become the number one driving force in our society, this is new, it may not feel good to think that we perpetuate this force, but it is only within 6 or 7 generations that this has come about. The reason Greek, Jewish, and Eastern philosophers wrote about virtue and harmony was not because they were hoping that these would become major principals, it was because they were major principals.

Who do you know that strives to be virtuous? You may say you know some, but how many, what percentage of the people you know are driven more by virtue (doing good) than greed? Do we say anything to those people? Do we complement the people who do good enough?

The world we live in does not give us the chance to change in the way we should. The design of perfect homes, cars, objects, packaging deters the feeling that your thoughts can be better than the groups. They want you to feel just bad enough to say, "If I have this, I will feel better." And this is the furthest we've come.

The man who stepped into the future is a thing of the past

More poetic than it is, I have substituted the link for "The Man Who Stepped into the Future" because he stopped posting (he was good for while). I have replaced him with a very good blog call "The Rich Girls Are Weeping", who writes nice commentary and seems to post often. The way things work, if you are savy enough I guess, is that you can take those links on the right and make a mix everyday of brand new and classic jams. Everyday basically, cuz they all post one or two tracks almost daily. That means that there are people recording, right now, the track that will be great on some other week... IN THE FUTURE!

"But how do I keep control of it all? Isn't there someone finding these things out for me?," you ask. Hence the second link- "elbo.ws", they read all the blogs, find the good songs and post where to find them. They also have a "what's hot", which sounds stupid, but there is so much out there, they are really doing us favors. I add their link at the bottom cuz it is easy to get to that way, use them.

So does anybody read the monologues? Leave a comment if you like one dammit.

Happy days (I submitted my first entry for a national conference today... Hello tenure in ten years, and then ten more years)